The more you become aware of changes, the less room for error you have. Meaning, the more you are able to put into words, the more is expected of you, to live the same way you speak, as though what you are saying doesn’t even make sense to you, to make sense of others, when Ive never complained about anyone not making sense to me or misdirecting attentions to me or anyone else for that matter, life is not scary until you go out alone, and while my experiences in life may have been minimized to jokes compared to the fears others have experienced, my condition was permanent, and now voices is permanent condition (not existing since 2017 during the moment of self-harm), resulting from talking not acting in defense of others, or called to action by ex-leaders, everyone thinking everything is a reflection of them, know you hurt you leave you, and then if you get worse tell you again “its your own fault” that’s someone never having seen you well to begin with, and if everythings a joke to them, then figure out what its about and do your best to explain before its too late and joke amongst a few turns into something else, not being okay. I think all humor is okay, that’s not the point, and all taunting, given the Lakers connection, makes sense to others, and probably something I keep forgetting, and if theyre not on your team in life, they will never be on your team, and maybe a feeling I got when I thought to apply to the US Navy, not the reason for running everyday in Santa Monica, to highlight a case read in Constitutional Law, a Facebook Passwords Case watched on CSPAN this was Fall 2011, I think everything looks loud, when its read as in reaction to and that’s what is being sought what change and in reaction to what, what pain, and for whos identity was made known to make a joke no longer feel good and result in the US Navy on Messenger blocking me, and the US Army offering to hire if I qualify meet their requirements for basic training, Im almost too old to go, and I don’t think you can go on meds, the only problem otherwise Id leave work for them and live on a quiet reservation somewhere away from interpretation, but that’s not way to live life to stop living life, so I can see my time online turning into something else, not a fight but clarifications and that’s assuming too much about me or others, and may only subject me to more harm, the joke that cracked the camels back, or whatever icing was added on top, to make matters worse, Im not some Christmas Tree Mona Lisa, everyone can take their turn attacking for reaction that would be what voices feel like something in you talking to you, that you don’t want to be apart of thinking processes bothersome, and that’s just how life gets I think is the point they are trying to communicate through me, by hurting me to speak until I eventually say things to explain where they are coming from, so that someone else is supported at my expense heard, and leave me with no support, or support that is hurting me as though I would leave anyone dying to be heard, you got your revenge, and this is not revenge this is work. That’s where another is wrong, to hurt or come off too strong toward someone they do not feel loves them, as through Im supposed to be this nice sweet person and be spoken to like Im stupid, slow me down, make my head hurt, and then all of a sudden my light which is supposed to be reserved to empower me is used instead for an opposing purpose to cause me harm, disfigure my face and body and leave me to die among whom? That’s not how life is meant to be lived, speak for yourselves, not through me, do you. These are the Arguments to Label Me a Traitor:
(11) Since she was not caught on to progress, she will not be allowed back into the heard. (12) She is too focused on herself to know or pay attention to the game going on around her. (13) Thinking that she is safe no matter where she goes, an uninspirational tid bit of history. (14) Mentions things, prosecutes her for mentions, to later prove because of if happens. (15) All her questions about life, punished for, as being about defenses, so never looks good. (16) Will not stay good mentioning the negative, if so, others feel bad, means it was deserved then. (17) What was deserved then not deserved now, cannot argue in humor, rational not existing then. (18) Described by me, means the same would be thought of having put into words what happened. (19) Knowing you secretly and not respecting you, hurting your ability based upon someone. (20) Thinking your purpose in life is representation of guilt = loss of respect, destruction of intelligence, or incapacitate ones ability to think, or cause to think stupid with a dirty mind. [removed arguments] Edit (11-23-20): Removed private childhood timeline to speak to a bigger subject about growing up being professional handling everything you hear with grace, not get sick by things said to you that dont make sense, think too hard about it later, the disconnect of not bonding with someone seeing eye to eye or understanding eachother on a deeper level intellectually, thats when someone reads your work and applies what they have learned to you and takes your place in life as advocate to everyone, and leaves you feeling sick, or made to be responsible for your own thinking, which was on point. So thats the noticeable difference, the lack of femininity, thats being treated as gay, effeminate with you, and masculine around everyone else, thats them keeping their face when you lose yours means not that smart at sex anyways. So please just leave things alone, Im not dating for the rest of my life working from home, everyone so offended taking personally things I wrote past and treating me as though Im not beautiful, so be better than #ignorehate #likeness #superiority #intelligence #leadership #love #respect #admiration #blame #liability #thebigpicture #communications. (Link): https://www.mymollydoll.com/blog/cover-letters-cond-made-11-21-20 (Sorry if my face body and voice confused anyone with regards to what I am like on the inside, beautiful or secretive, ambitious, or angry, driven, or done, tired, dumb. I think when youre feeling dumb thats just low self-esteem the body and mind can heal itself but not by being mean back, usually when people give up, they dont intend to set limits and get angry with you, its that if your the problem, they suffer having not figured out what was going wrong, and thats leaving people behind in life, not looking out for them when confident or doing well, thats keeping problems to yourself, its always at your expense focused on the wrong things in life, and it will always be made an excuse of to explain why no one is in your life: sexuality, genetics, intelligence, jealously?)
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AuthorLeslie Fischman Archives
July 2021
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