You’ll reach varying points in sobriety, no matter what you intend on quitting, it will take time, its like co-dependency where you ended someone or something to fulfill a need to make you feel whole, which can be accomplished by otherwise doing something positive for yourself, to help stabilize your mood, its usually when you are not doing things to help yourself or others, that your luck runs out, either causing harm to yourself, or others feeling harmed by your lack of care for yourself, treat you differently, at those times when you are focused on your goals in life, if not in alignment with the goals of others, there may be a questionable space to which they feel the right to question your purposes as not being for positive purpose, if you keep rehashing suicide at a meeting then yes I will run to the graveyard fence and back before a meeting in protest, as a victim of suicide, its very triggering to hear a story about someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, and not feel empathy for others, including the story teller, if the opposite was saught to occur to trigger empathy in a suicide victim for the victim, than that is testing the empathies of others, and their responses to the passing of others, if empathied with or not empathized with and by their reactions deem whether they are sympathetic of the causes for suicide of others, with or against the groups methodology, from my standpoint as someone attending a meeting twice a day for 90 days, that was offensive not a great selling point for the meeting, to have lost someone past, when the meeting is together now, in the positive, at points in the past, there may have been other triggering factors, its important not to blame bloggers or law students for their existence, and claim that my existence online or in law school spurred illness in others or to their interpretations. -Why I built a website mymollydoll.com some people just don’t know when to stop experimenting with the psyche of others … you never know who similarly may be affected by the experiments of others, myself included, and its important as on the outside not to be interpreting the actions of others, on a together note, and think maybe my response was a justified ill response to the triggering of discussions of suicide in a meeting why was it okay for someone to talk about a loss of sponsee by suicide but not okay for me to discuss my suicide.
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AuthorLeslie Fischman Archives
July 2021
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